I am in Haiti. In my arms is one of our precious children. We're working to evacuate them. There's aftershocks, military, people everywhere. Confusion reigns. I hold on to my child, trying to protect him. Go here, go there. Destruction around us. More buildings falling. Dust swirls around. Many children are crying. I hold my child tighter, grateful he will never remember any of this. So much going on, everyone busy, everyone confused. It gets dark, the earth continues to tremble. Suddenly, a familiar voice. Garn. "Honey, are you okay?" "Huh?" My brain is swimming, trying to understand what's going on. "You're thrashing so much". I open my eyes. We are not in Haiti. We are in Canada. I was dreaming again. "Our work is finished" I tell myself. "No more evacuations, the kids are all out." The child in my arms is nothing more than a pillow. I feel relief that the children are okay and home with their "forever families". I feel sadness that I'm not still there. I feel disappointed that it is only a pillow I hold. I feel confused at many conflicting emotions. I roll over and try to go back to sleep. Again.
And every night, I go back.
5 comments:
i had the same thing
Garn
Oh, you guys, my heart hurts for you! I'm praying for you, that God will take away your nightmares, that He will remind you that you did what you could and that the kids are safe. Try to rest in Him.
Hugs to both of you! Thank you for the awesome job you did and for your willingness to go and be the hands and feet of Jesus. We love you! Ruby and Dick
Hugs Michelle, I cannot say I understand because I've never gone through what you did. Know though, that you are safe in the arms of Jesus. Those nightmares will lessen but the love you have for Haiti and it's people will remain.
God is good.
Marie
Michelle, Garner,
I,too, am having the same dreams-thoughts through the night. I am wondering how long it will last. I am struggling, in my dreams, to save the children, only to wake to empty arms. Oh how I miss the little guys, but very thankful that I was able to have a small part, with God's help, in uniting some of the children with their "forever families". You two are so awesome, I thank God for allowing our paths to cross. Until we meet again...
Post a Comment